Numb

Numb 

The water always calmed me down.
I felt at peace stood next to the water.
I liked how it moves and how it sounds;
I liked the constant noise ,
I felt completely engulfed and at home.

The water moves down stream to my left,
ripples running away from me.
I am so at peace,
for the first time in a long time.

It used to have that beautiful effect on me,
I wish it still did,
now I'm just numb.

I know the water is cold,
I don't need to touch it to know it's freezing,
but when I do,
I don't feel cold.

I'm numb.
I'm numb to hot and cold,
I'm numb to happy and sad.
I'm just numb,
and that's okay.

(the poem that made me realise i love to write)